How to heal after trauma

While researching my book Gaslighting for God: A Satirical Guide to Save Yourself from Spiritual Narcissists (Lake Drive Books, January 2026), I noticed that a number of former pastors and survivors of #churchtoo abuses are now promoting themselves, especially on social media, as religious trauma healers, Christian deconstruction life coaches, and the like. Some of those hawking their wares, especially those still new to this field, are not properly certified (with a few of them veering into the “certifiable” category) to address serious cases that would be better treated by genuine credentialed professionals. 

Along those lines, I removed from the book some quotes by those promoting themselves as trauma experts, such as Dr. Laura Anderson, author of the New York Times best-seller When Religion Hurts You, after multiple credible charges came to light. In a similar vein, I almost signed up for an online seminar promoted by internationally renowned trauma expert Gabor Maté. But before I clicked the register button, I realized the event included Teal Swan and Marisa Peer as among the world's leading trauma experts, even though in both cases their work has come under scrutiny for their unlicensed and controversial practices.  

How, then, do those who want to heal from their traumas find a qualified guide to help them on their healing journey?

To help me answer this question, I reached out to Sara Miley of Full Circle Wellspring. We first met when I appeared on her podcast Trauma Survivorhood in 2024. I found her to be a professional, empathic voice who knows how to gently guide people towards the right person to help them heal from their traumas. 

Trauma-trained versus trauma-informed

According to Miley, people need to understand the difference between a trauma-trained and a trauma-informed professional. She describes trauma-informed as having an awareness and understanding of trauma, so a practitioner has a trauma-sensitive approach to their work. They might have certifications or licenses, but they're not actually trauma-trained.

In comparison, Miley observes, "A person who is trauma-trained is going to understand the levels of impact of how trauma affects you neurobiologically, physiologically, psychologically, clinically, and somatically." Also, they're usually trained in different types of somatic modalities such as EMDR. "A trauma-trained professional is the person trauma survivors really want to work with on their recovery journey," she recommends. 

Check their certifications and training

Any certifications or training they possess should be based on a modality they did not invent. Have the modalities they're utilizing been properly peer-reviewed, or are they the only known "expert" in this particular practice? Often, those working in trauma will combine multiple modalities and package them into their own wrapper. Miley believes this is fine, as long as they've been trained by a credible institution such as the Internal Family Systems (IFS) developed by Richard Schwartz.

Ask where they received their training credentials, along with any ongoing training they do. Any qualified trauma practitioner will willingly provide this information to you, as well as explain the code of ethics they're bound to follow as per their specific licenses or certificates. Here transparency is key. Miley lets her clients know up front what she can and cannot do. For instance, as the scope of her practice is completely non-diagnostic, she cannot prescribe medication or make a diagnosis like ADHD. She reflects, "When you set those clear spaces as a trauma-trained practitioner, you're allowing your clients to see right up front that transparency of who you are and what you're about." 

Be very cautious if they are not part of any professional organization and don't meet with others in their field regularly as part of an accountability group. Walk away if they do not have an accountability system in place where you can go if this person traumatizes or retraumatizes you during your work together. And run from anyone claiming to be trained in a particular modality if they're not listed as an approved provider by the entity that issued the license or certificate. 

No miracle cures

In Miley's estimation, those practitioners promising a quick fix for trauma survivors are not really going into their clients' trauma. During the first few sessions, assess if your system feels safe with this person. Check to see if they are picking up on your nonverbal cues. For example, if you're squirming, they should pick up on these signs and suggest slowing down a bit and exploring the reasons for your discomfort. They should not dismiss or minimize your feelings in their quest to push forward and "cure" you.  

Conversely, once you've developed an ongoing healing practice that you can implement on your own, a credible trauma expert will celebrate (or at least accept) that you no longer feel the need to work with them. Should something come up that makes you feel dysregulated, they understand you're booking an appointment to address a specific issue and nothing more. They will not try to oversell you by pushing you to keep purchasing their products. 

Tune into your body

If a trauma expert keeps the work in the cognitive realm without addressing the body, Miley would question their trauma training. "You're going to have a harder time healing from your trauma if you stay cognitive," she reports. "They should be able to detect subtle cues like when your breath changes, and then ask you what you're feeling in your body."

During the intake interview, tune in to how the practitioner reacts when you bring up factors such as your relationship status, employment history, and other personal data. Do you sense the therapist is accepting of your legitimate life choices that some may question such as being in an open relationship with multiple partners, having a child as a solo parent, or coming out as LGBT? In a similar vein, do they judge and condemn, or do they validate trauma responses—including suicidality, cheating, and self-harming behaviors—as protective measures? Miley states, "Trauma survivors need to be understood that what they did was literally in service of their survival." 

Along those lines, they allow you to go at your own pace. When a painful topic comes up, they might gently ask, "Are we okay to dig into that right now?" But they won't push or judge you if you don't yet have the capacity to go any further. 

Finally, even after trauma survivors feel healed from their trauma, they may find it hard to put this work into practice. A qualified trauma practitioner will help their clients apply the skills they learned in their sessions to their interactions with the real world.

In the future, we may live in a world where mental health care from compassionate, qualified professionals is freely available to all survivors of trauma. Until that day comes, we need to inform ourselves and be discerning about finding the best practitioners to guide us in healing. In that way, we can learn not just to survive, but to thrive.